Thursday, July 17, 2008

Am I the only person NOT going to BlogHer?

Hello. This is Texan Mama. This is not a guest post. I am not on an airplane. Or in an airport. Or in a hotel. Or at a party.

I am at home, sitting on a plastic step stool/office chair, waiting for the baby to wake up in the middle of the night, and squeezing in a few more minutes before I have to get up and pee the boy child.

By the way, when I say "pee the boy child" what I mean is that I have to go wake him so that he will not pee in his bed. I drag him out of his bed and push him down the hall toward the bathroom, his feet dragging, his chin bouncing off his chest. I then get him in front of the toilet and start cheering. "Come on, you can do it. Just let it go. Go ahead and pee. You're in front of the potty now. You can do it. Good job buddy. I knew you could do it!"

Every single night. Except the nights when I forget or when I'm too late. Then he gets to sleep in his pee sheets and I get to do an extra load of laundry in the morning.

I'm not exactly sure what BlogHer is all about but I have a feeling that it might be like a conference I have attended: Hearts at Home. Except without so many nursing flaps and with lots more sarcasm.

I went to the Hearts at Home Conference in 2006. I really enjoyed it. For those who don't know, it is a conference put together to support and educate mothers about the profession of motherhood. There are keynote speakers and smaller break-out sessions, with topics ranging from "How to feed a family on a budget" to "Dealing with your adolescent" to "Strengthen your Marriage through communication" to "Understanding Autism", etc. It is a fairly popular conference, and when I attended I felt really, well, empowered! After my 2 days on the University campus in Normal, IL, I went home feeling like I had just shared secrets with my industry's most experienced professionals. I was at the top of my game.

Then I walked in the door to a mountain of dirty dishes. And multiple loads of laundry (washed, albeit, but unfolded). And the kids were so excited to see me that of course they couldn't leave my side until they were asleep in their beds that evening. Then the husband was needing the sex, so I was his for the night, until he rolled over to go to sleep since he was so exhausted from all the housework, er, I mean, watching the children destroy our living space with toys and food and dirty clothes and shoes and coloring pages and board games and and and...

Okay, take a breath. In. Out. In. Out.

So, I am not attending the big BlogHer conference in San Francisco. I know, I know, it seems to be the mecca for all females who blog. There are so many blogging "cliques": the Mommy Blogs, Blog Her Ad Network, AllTop, etc. Some people have compared blogging to high school and I can see that connection. So I guess I would fit in the same way I did in high school: while I would like to fit in with the cool kids, I know deep down that I don't really belong and if I was accepted it would only be because they haven't figured out the real, dorky me.

The main reason I'm not going to BlogHer is because up until a month ago I had never wrtitten a blog and had never even heard of BlogHer. But more than that, I think I just don't want to IMMERSE myself in blogging. I enjoy it. I seem to relax by purging my thoughts via the internet to any and every person willing to read. Blogging stimulates my desire to have people pay attention to me and also to share my true feelings on this, that, and whatever else. Anonymity helps too. But I don't want to start spending more time on my laptop than I do with my family. (NOTE TO READERS: Don't get offended. I'm not saying you do that. I'm saying I could see myself doing that if I let myself get really addicted to blogging.) I can see how blogging could lead to too much time thinking about the blog, writing about the blog, taking pictures for the blog, reading other peoples blogs, commenting on other peoples blogs, checking comments for my blogs, researching topics included in my blog, blog blog blog... Choosing to keep blogging to just a fun activity, rather than a daily or even hourly addiction, is an exercise in self-restraint.

I'm just new at this, and I may have the facts wrong, but it seems like the big-time bloggers all support and give shout-outs to the other big-time bloggers. They all hang together. I have been to their blogs and clicked on their blogrolls and don't see the "little guys" listed (with the exception of my best gal-pal Angie). It seems to just be links to all of each other's blogs. I'm a nobody in cyberspace. I have a happy little blog that gets a comment here and there but for the most part I'm just typing to see myself write. I may never get the attention of the the Big Guns but is that what blogging is about??? Which causes me to ask myself, what is it about???? Is it basically the evolution of magazines or op-ed, taken to the internet? Or is it a way to communicate with family and friends? Or is it a forum for creative writers to pen their next masterpiece? Or is it all of that???

See, I'm just a person with a blog to share my thoughts with y'all. If you're laughing, that makes me happy. If you're thinking, again I'm happy. If you're skipping my post because I don't have a BlogHer Ad box on the sidebar of my blog, then I guess that's your loss. Because sometimes I am funny. And sometimes I do make you think.

So, while I love reading the musings of different blog writers, if I start seeing TOO MUCH INFORMATION about the BlogHer conference I might have to start looking for new, unknown bloggers. I guess that conference will be interesting to hear about, but why do I have the feeling that everyone will be writing about the same stuff? I mean, if you're all there together and something interesting happens, won't you all see it at the same time? And, after all, I wanna support the underdog, the unknown artist, the "little guy".

I guess that Hearts at Home is to mothers what BlogHer is to bloggers. Empowerment. Knowledge. Support. Comraderie. But I just want all those blogging mommies out there who attended the BlogHer conference that I know what you'll be facing once you step in the front door of your house.

And I wouldn't trade places with ya. Good luck.


Bridgett said...

hearts at home sounds like a LLL conference I went to a few years back. I had the younger one with me but the older one with Gran. It was a great time (I was a leader at the time and got to go to a session that should have been entitled "the freakiest things I have ever seen" but was really something like "working with mothers with rare conditions related to breastfeeding"). I learned so much and felt so empowered and smart. It lasted until I retired as a leader about 6 months later...

I'm not at blogher; I will never go. I try not to mix my blogworld with my real life, and so it would be very disconcerting. I'm also very shy, but combined with an overbearing personality...not a good mix. It is sort of like high school. New girl, protective coloration, don't open my mouth, make it to the second tier or so, never feel like I belong there, too smart, pick the wrong boyfriend. Ah well.

Sabrina said...

Wow, I stumbled upon your blog the other day and have enjoyed each and everything I have read. I am very new to blogging and am amazed at how many people actually blog. Thank you for your words of wisdom, no need to conference after reading what you have to say. Thanks very much:-0

Lisa@verybusymomwith4 said...

I think blogging is about what you want--I think many do it for all the reasons mentioned. I do it for sanity's sake--a break for myself :)

I think you will really enjoy blogging--it's a great way to get out emotions.

Bridge said...

I missed Blogher, but I will be going to San Francisco Friday ( A WEEK LATE) but certainly prefer a Giants game and walks on the beach.

Donna-Michele said...

I have yet to set up my own blog, but am working up to it. You are a great inspiration, btw. I really enjoy reading yours.

I don't go to conferences, period. Especially not across the country... I don't enjoy crowds, & it's just not in the budget.

binks said...

I know this is like months after the original post but..

Texan Mama - I feel exactly the same way. Don't know about Blogher either. Did those guys get all those readers just from being there?

That is why I came back to read your past blogs to catch up. Since your like me and just started this crazy bloggin' hopefully, it won't take too long.

McVal said...

I've never heard of Blogher. I'm fairly new to blogging too. About 3 months or so now. I mainly started it because a college friend that I rarely see has one and I wanted to keep up with what's going on in her life.
In the meanwhile, I've made a few friends out here and it's been fun! I'm kind of treating it like my own personal diary of what I want to talk about. If the "public" out there is interested, great! Otherwise, eh...! This way my husband can read back on the year from my perspective when he writes the Christmas letter and get some ideas.
I like your blog. Your sense of humor and sarcasm are great. If I didn't know you were in Texas, I'd have to say you sound a lot like one of my sisters.