Thursday, December 25, 2008

Having a Shitty Christmas? Join the Crowd!

Let's see, where shall I begin?

Last night, on Christmas Eve, Texan Papa decides that we should hide the presents after leaving for church, one of us taking the 3 older kids and one of us staying behind with the baby after the others have left. He asked if I wanted to stay behind. Sure, I said. Baby Sally was VERY helpful with the presents - throwing, tearing, dropping... you know how it is with at 14-month old.

Texan Papa tells me, "You're going to need to calm down." I hate those words. HATE. H.A.T.E.

This morning, we have ANOTHER fight on the way to church - again - because I realize Linus has been walking on TOP of my van. I tell him that we'll talk about it later, but continue to say that it's dangerous and it will break other people's things... until I'm interrupted by Texan Papa who says, "Aren't you going to talk about it LATER?" Oh, I just love being corrected by my husband. I love it just a little bit more than being told I need to calm down. Heh. And, it's not enough that I hear, all day long, "Mom, you didn't fix this for me yet!" "Mom, when are you going to put batteries in that?" "Mom, don't say 'stupid'." "Mom, it's my turn now. You told me I could have a turn now!" "MOM" "MOM" "MOM"

And Linus. Oh, dear Linus. I have no idea what to do with him. He decided to push his brother Charlie Brown (over 60 lbs) and the neighbor boy (probably about 70 lbs) together in the baby's BRAND NEW NEVER USED CHRISTMAS PRESENT bike-buggy stroller

Photo Courtesy of Google Images

Now, mind you, this is for a BABY. And what did Linus do? Well, he decided to do "tricks" with it by pushing the boys, in the buggy, and slamming them into the curb (hoping the buggy would just bounce right on up onto the sidewalk). And, what happened you ask? Well, just what you'd expect - the front wheel attachment cracked and broke, and the fabric on the front of the buggy got torn. THIS IS BEFORE WE COULD EVEN GIVE IT TO HER. And, when it happened, what did Linus and Charlie Brown do? Well, at the suggestion of demon child neighbor boy, they decided to just leave it in the garage and hope the grown-ups wouldn't find it.

On Tuesday, what did Linus do? He slammed his own bike into Charlie Browns, and bent the back gear spokes, rendering it unusable.

Wednesday night, what do I discover? Charlie Brown had decided to use his dresser as a carving tool, scraping his initials into the wood. "What? I didn't use marker!" he protested. He thought what he did was FINE!

This afternoon, I went outside with Baby Sally, to push her on her favorite tricycle.

And what do I find? Nothing. Trike is stolen. It's not enough that our scooter was stolen out of our own front yard. It's not enough that people smash in the windows of cars on our street that are parked RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEIR HOUSES. But now, people are stealing baby's toys? WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE????? I am absolutely sickened. I don't know whether to feel completely pissed off, or relieved that the trike only cost $5 from a resale shop. I am just a little bit weepy when I think about how much fun she had on that trike. How, every time we went out to the garage, she immediately got on it and her face lit up. How she enjoyed that trike so much - she didn't care how much it cost or if it was fancy. And now, it's gone. Yes, left in our front yard. Shame on us for keeping our belongings on our own property.

And, let's top it off. I'm sure this happened to you too, maybe not this year but sometime: Phrases heard at approximately 7:35 am this morning:

"Is this it?"

"It's not fair. I only got some of what I wished for, not all of it."

"I don't like this."

Did I mention that we got a BIKE for each of the boys and a NEW SCOOTER for Peppermint Patty? They didn't even notice them when they woke up. They went straight for the TV and walked right past the bikes in front of the tree.

That's it. Next year we're skipping December altogether. Or becoming Jehovah's Witnesses.


Jennifer said...

I'm not looking forward to those ages. I just don't know how you teach them to not be that way when they are surrounded by it. So sad. I hope your day got better.

Nicole O'Dell said...

Ugh! So sorry you had a tough day! At least it's over?

Megryansmom said...

Hi I came from McMommy's as soon as I heard you were having a shitty day. I have coffee and booze if that's your preference. Come sit with me and complain all you want.

Scary Mommy said...

Ugh, that's terrible. What bastards to take the bike--- I want to hunt them down for you. :( Hope the rest of the day improved...?

Every Day Goddess said...

So sorry your day was so bad!!! Just think you have a whole year to forget how horrible this Christmas was!!! We have the same issue in our neighborhood with people taking our things from our yard, scooters seem to be real popular items to steal, and a go cart and bike (with the baby seat on back no less!!!). I hope you have a better New Year!!

mommy nurse said...

I stumbled across your site and love it! I love that you say it like it is, don't mince words. Thank goodness today is almost over so you can do it all over again tommorrow. Hopefully it will be better. PS I would check the neighbor boy's house for the scooter? Who knows if he broke it and is hiding it from you?

stephanie (bad mom) said...

I'm sorry I didn't check in earlier - not that I have anything sage to offer but I could have started praying earlier :)

Here's hoping tomorrow couldn't possibly be worse. (Any chance Texan Papa can be home all day while you hit sales, have cocktails - I mean coffee, and be alone with yourself?)

Bridgett said...

Links: who knows? I don't know why it's doing for Christmas, sigh. I have a 4 year old with asthmatic coughing right now, 2 1/2 hours from home. I think we're heading home this afternoon.

Anna See said...

Ugh. What a horrible, horrible day.

E said...

Okay read my comment on the next entry and repeat here. Then go rent Home for the Holidays. Watch it with your husband and giggle over other people's bad holidays.
When our kids were little we opened presents on days leading up to Christmas so it wasn't so much all at once.
And just like how at mealtimes we talked about taking a thank you taste for the work the cook had put into the meal, we talked also about being thankful that someone had spent time shopping, choosing, making or buying, wrapping, etc. All that time they were thinking about us! This helped.
Oh and we had a gratitude chart. Every time one of us was grateful we wrote it on the chart. Everyone wanted to write on the chart and be recognized for their attitude of gratitude. We are a competitive bunch os we all looked for things to be thankful for. It worked a treat.
And take lots of hot baths. Tell hubby, oh sweetie you are right I do need to calm down. I'd better go take a bath. And leave him with whatever mess. This will train him away from telling you to calm down I promise you. Or you will get lots of restful baths. Either way you win....