Monday, October 19, 2009

Being Average is Okay

Do you know what a Flip video camera is?
If you don't, that's good. Because if you did, it would be one more thing you'd have on your list to save up for, or dream about buying, or convince yourself that you reeeeeeaaaalllyyy need.

Like me.

You see, Scary Mommy is having a contest, searching for women who claim to be the "Scariest Mommy".

The winner gets a Filp Camera! WHEE!!! I *SO* want that prize. Have I mentioned that I'm going to have a baby really soon? And it would be so awesome to bring a Flip Camera to the hospital instead of my huge-ass Hi-8 Sony Camcorder that sounds like a 1950's-era heating unit kicking on every time I press "record".

But anyway, onto my scariness. Or, rather, the lack thereof.

I would love to write about how I totally kick ass when it comes to breastfeeding. Or, how my kids may act up but when push comes to shove, they know to fear my wrath. And, that I can fashion a slew of leftovers into a gourmet meal.

But really? I'm just average.

My very best dish is homemade Chicken Noodle Soup. I use store-bought noodles, a chicken breast or two, some cut-up carrots, cut up onions (or even dried chopped onions if I'm in a pinch), and chicken bouillon. I'm certainly no Wolfgang Puck. But my family loves it.

And, when it comes to being a Chief Home Executive, I should probably abdicate my role to someone else more capable, like our dog. I have piles of bills all over the house, all of which are waiting to be filed and some of which are waiting to be paid. But I've never been sent to collections yet, so I guess I'm doing something right.

So, I'm good but not great. I'm satisfied but not ecstatic. I'm patient but sometimes I explode. I'm on top of things but occasionally something slips through the cracks.

I don't know if I really deserve the title of "Scariest Mommy". I have a supportive husband. We have a good marriage. He is an awesome dad and he even encourages me to go on a girls' week trip every year with my friends. My kids are all healthy and happy and smart. None of them have any learning disabilities or physical disabilities or social problems. And, I know I'm biased but I think they are all really adorable! My extended family is all really normal and I'm super close to them. I even really enjoy my in-laws!

So, I'm not exactly "the phoenix rising out of the ashes". I feel like the worst thing I've had to overcome in my whole life is never being picked for Homecoming Court. I've never faced divorce or injury or death. I'm not exactly a testament to women who've overcome adversity in order to build a successful life for themselves.

So, does this make me unexciting? Maybe. But I am real. I have real experiences and I can listen. I am a good friend and I don't pretend to be something I'm not. With me, what you see is what you get. I believe tactful honesty is more important than telling someone what they want to hear just to make them feel better. Quite often, I don't notice when people lose or gain weight because I have long since quit noticing my friends' bodies. Looking them in the eye is much more important to me now. And, if anyone is ever afraid of offending me, I tell them, "oh, hey, you're going to have to do a LOT more than that to hurt MY feelings." I love making my friends feel safe with me, that our friendship is not so fragile that just a few words can be twisted into some tangled mess and compromise something genuine. I don't give out my love to just anyone, and if I love you then it's because I see real value in you. You deserve the benefit of the doubt and a second (or third or fourth) chance when you screw up and most of all, forgiveness. Because I need forgiveness too.

So, although my story is pretty mediocre - at BEST - I think that's okay. For so long, I hated the idea that I was just an average person. I'm very nondescript. I'm just another Stay-At-Home-Mom on the block. But, looking at what I've got, I know I'm blessed.

So, even though I'm not so scary, PLEASE leave a comment if you think I should win the Flip camera. Because, you know you want to. Our little baby wants me to have it. (That's a shameless plug, isn't it?)


Janie at Sounding Forth said...

I SO think you should win that Flip camera!!

Emily said...

I think you should win the flip camera just because you're cool! You are wayyyy too funny to be just average! ;)

Wendy said...

Overcoming adversity can certainly build you as a person.

Or break you down.

It doesn't take adversity to make you a good anything. Anyone has the potential to do anything - no matter where they came from or what they've been through. Or haven't been through!

And being average is doing far better than a large part of society. Especially when you consider that a lot of what appears to be above average... isn't under the surface.

Jennifer said...

The older I get the more I appreciate average. It is a lot harder to maintain than most people thing.

Aleta said...

Awww, I think you should have the flip camera for your baby!!! My parents bought a flip camera and LOVE LOVE LOVE it!!

Jen said...

But I want the camera. Well, maybe we can share, 6 mo with you and 6 mo with me?

San said...

Awww! I love your post! Honest and to the point! :D

And all the best with the cam! I submitted my entry for the heck of it (though I dun qualify cos I dun live in the States...) haha! So hey! My best wishes to ya! Hope you do get it :)

Scary Mommy said...

I love you because you are real. Perfection is so overrated. And often supported by drugs!

Amber Page Writes said...

I think average is a wonderful thing to be. I used to wish for the moon and the stars, but these days I'm happy to have my humdrum life.