Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Santa Knows How To Give the Bird

So I went shopping at Target today. And actually it wasn't too bad. I have this great shopping list pad of paper, where there are all these columns divided into sections like "Frozen" and "Paper/Cleaning" and "Deli" etc. That way, I never have to push the cart up and down the same aisle 5 times because I just can't get all the items from that aisle at the same time. If I push my cart up and down an aisle 5 times it is only because I can't find something or because I realized I needed something that wasn't on the list.

Anyway, after leaving Target, I am leaving the parking lot. I'm on the main strip of pavement - you know, the one that runs straight in front of the store, the one where all the perpendicular parking rows feed into that one - and I'm just about to head out of the Target parking lot. Suddenly, a maroon Nissan Pathfinder almost pulls out in front of me from a side parking row. We're both coming at the same time - neither of us speeding or anything - but I figure that I've got the right of way, so I slow down at first but then keep traveling. And, as I look over, I see an old man who looks quite a bit like Santa driving the maroon Nissan Pathfinder. I chuckle to myself, because I figure, well it's not a sleigh but at least he's got the color right. And, as he pulls into the flow of traffic behind me, he blows his jolly old horn, nice and long, and flips me the bird. Not casually either. Not like, "Ah, you're a jerk." It was almost as if he was pointing at me. Like, "Yeah, I mean YOU! Here's my middle finger, just for you! No, I'm NOT telling you you're number one! I'm telling you, YOU'RE ON THE NAUGHTY LIST!!!"

I think I'll light a fire in my fireplace on Christmas Eve.

Click Here for the credit of Old Man White Beard photo.

10 comments:

Em said...

Excellent!

Blatant disregard to any other human has replaced over consumption as my #1 pet peeve of Christmas.

I have to hit the mall today.

I'm scared. So very, very scared.

Definitely stoke the fire. I'd spit in his milk too while you're at it.

Anna See said...

Naughty Santa!

Amy O'Connor said...

Oh that Santa deserves a big lump of coal! Make sure you keep lots of logs close to that fire!

Courtney said...

Hahahaha.

That's messed up but funny at the same time. Probably because of how you told the story.

People are crazy. :)

Lisa@verybusymomwith4 said...

LOL---You should use salt instead of sugar for his cookies this year ;)

Angelica Bays, TygrLilies.com said...

Sew...
he was pissed off because you were not graciously giving up the right of way to him?
Grey beard?
Guess the "Entitled Generation" didn't necessarily start recently did it?

Foursons said...

Hahahaha- Santa is a Scrooge!

Gigi said...

Bad, bad Santa!!!!!

Jennifer said...

Pretty sure this could only happen to you. LOL

Emily said...

Nah, that guy will be getting coal in his stocking for falsely impersonating Santa!